Give time time

I promised myself to let go after my birthday. I tried to, almost managed to but then you came to me and I lost myself.

I knew I wasn't ready to let us go so I tried, tried so hard with the hope that I could drive the idea through, so that I can make u see the similarities the bigger picture and the efforts you thought I never made.

I rejected the idea of impermanence. I wanted us to last forever. I forgot I can never fight the karmic cause and conditions, or His arrangement as you might comprehended. I stubbornly believed that I could create new fate between us. I could make us last forever or as long as I live.

I still believe so, that i can create the new fate for us. But then, I m taking it slow. Returns don't always come right after our efforts. My biggest wish is to plant the seeds, without thinking about the time to ripe the fruits. Even if not now not this life, I have done what I could. The biggest gift from you is to let me go. In return, I wish you the opportunity and wisdom to see things through. And I gave you my promise, that you can come to me anytime, when you finally need me.

I trust we are somehow connected with everyone we meet in life. Some are passerby some are teachers in life some are debtors some are creditors.

I know I told u I regret that I met u in my life but that's not true. Every encounters are blessed with reasons. I appreciate things you taught me and brought to my life.

For now, we have done our chapter. So go, go get the answers you need. You know how to get me when you finally need me.

1 September, I heard the door closed behind me. For good.
2 September, I felt the sunray on my face.

I m now learning. Photosynthesis is always what I need, to generate my own nutrient and energy. I m scared and excited as I live the days. I am good and I am going to be better.

I am working hard, for myself and for the next person I m going to meet. Who knows, it could end up to be you?

I respect your decision and I understand it's the best for us. It's a courageous decision but it requires more to get through it.

I m sorry I can't be there for you for the rest of your life. Remember what I told you and jiayou. Jiayou, just the way you did when we first met and when you first fall for me.

Till we meet again, take care.